Blond Potato! (Sung to the Tune of My Sharon) Today’s BORKING REPORT!

On By Rhys FordIn Borking Day1 Comment
Today’s BORKING REPORT!
The Blond Potato has had TWO great Borking Days. It really helps starting earlier when it’s cooler and probably with less people out. Of course, he’s usually more awake at 8 am than he is at 10 am. By 10 am, he’s settled into a full nap and is off snoring.
Yesterday was a BIG day for him as well because his Auntie Suzhang has come for a week long visit AND he got a puppichino. And smuggled treats but not a lot because Potatoes do not need extra chubbage.
In place at the sliding glass door is now a 4 inch tall, short ramp for him to use to get back up into the house. That small ledge is at an awkward angle and much like an old school bus, a Potato does not bend in the middle. It’s been a tremendous help and he’s been gamboling in and out with great ease.
Also, the song My Sharona can TOTALLY be adapted for Blond Potatoes while they are rolling around on sun-warmed concrete. With a chorus of “Blond Potato….” you can make your own verses. To be fair, I also sing “They see me rollin’, they be hatin’…” at him when he cavorts about too.
The boy does love a good roll….
Look at his sassy self during his Bork. Because he got a good roll in!
From his Auntie Jessica:
It was nice and cool out today and Gus loved it! He especially loved all the damp grass to roll in! We walked to the corner again and kept it slow paced.
Best,
Jessica

Wow. So much happens yet so little…

On By Rhys FordIn Bloggy Stuff3 Comments

Summer is here in San Diego and well, I wasn’t ready for it. We’ve gotten the backyard kind of summer ready with an above ground pool, patio furniture, rainbow lights and as alway, there’s a little blond Potato cairn terrorist more than happy to roll around in the sun.

I’ve returned to working the day job in the building today and it’s rather surreal. I don’t think I can even type on this keyboard anymore. I’m so used to my laptop. 😀 We’re all still distancing and wearing masks when leaving our offices but the majority of us are in place for a few days a week. It’s all rather strange.

If you haven’t noticed, I’m a big Marvel fan… well mostly the secondary characters like Bucky and Loki so I’m very excited about the Loki series. Watched the first one and man, I’m ready for the rest of it. CANNOT WAIT>

And I want to share this link abou the Top 10 Amazing “Secret” History notes about some famous places. These kinds of things are like a rabbit hole for me. I get started on one link and then… I’m falling in. This one is not exception:
https://listverse.com/2021/06/15/top-10-amazing-hidden-histories-from-the-worlds-most-famous-places/

And I also wanna leave you with three of the best Burger Masters there are… most notably…. a hack for the In-N-Out Burger, which is my fave burger of all time.

Oh yeah and some others.

I’m going to try to stop in more and chat. Just to keep things going and well, fire up my brains and the words / characters I’ve got brewing. Very exciting.

Now available in PDF and Audiobook file… Nothing Else Matters (A McGinnis/Kim Wedding Invitation)

On By Rhys FordIn Bloggy Stuff, Free Stuff2 Comments
For those who missed it… like me who’d forgotten I’d written it (it’s been a long year!)… Andi Van thankfully collected up the bits and pieces into one location. So, it is with great pleasure I present to you…
Nothing Else Matters (A McGinnis and Kim Wedding Invitation)
Not only do you get the story and a downloadable PDF, you also can hear Greg Tremblay‘s sublime narration of the story as well as download the combined audiobook file.
Hope you enjoy.
https://rhysford.com/cole-mcginnis-investigations/nothing-else-matters-an-invitation-to-the-mcginnis-kim-wedding/
 

Changes in Facilities’ Management

On By Rhys FordIn Rhys Ford11 Comments

Please be aware of the changes to the Cabin when preparing for your next visit. There is now a fairly substantial bathroom tax that must be rendered appropriately for the duration of at least one minute following passing through the threshold.

If the tax collector is accepting payments at the time of your visit, you will be notified by the continuing undulating siren followed by an aggressive weaving motion towards you. It is recommended that all sojourns to the facilities include enough time allowance for this payment.

Payment can include the retrieval of the tax collector from the floor followed by a cradling and scritching of the collector’s head. Floor-based ear scritching is accepted but the full payment is preferred. Tail base scritching is also acceptable payment but must be accompanied by chin rubs in order to fulfill financial obligations.

Payments should continue until tax collector renders a full payment has been submitted. The payee will mark the end of payment by the subtle application of the tax collector’s double punch fang marks on their hand. Please be advised, at times the collector may return for further payment after first installment has been rendered if said collector is not satisfied once departing the facility. Should this occur following the closing of the facility door, it is recommended the user remove any appendages (including feet) from the bottom of the door as further collection may occur while occupied.

By posting this notice, Cabin Management is not responsible for any injuries inflicted to user of facilities by any third-party vendor used to collect and receive appropriate payment for facility use.

Today’s BORKING REPORT!

On By Rhys FordIn Borking Day1 Comment
Today’s BORKING REPORT!
 
We didn’t have any Borks last week as we acclimated the house to Gojira’s introduction and Gus wasn’t quite walk-ready this morning. It’s kind of warm so we’ll be moving the Borking Times up a bit to take advantage of the cooler hours. Of course he was like… I don’t wanna walk on the sidewalk, I just wanna roll around on the grass… and when he came home, he trundled around the house in his normal cool down and pretty much walked around more than he did outside.
 
Because he’s not stupid and he knows his Auntie Jessica will stay and scritch him for a long time when he comes back. So he gets belly rubs and scritches instead of going for exercise. It’s a fine balance of getting a walk in and manipulation for the old Potato.
 
Gojira kitteh made a guest appearance to sniff at Auntie Jessica before going to hunt down Brother Badger… who she’s been chasing around the house. Badger has discovered he might be getting a bit too old for prolonged shenanigans because he plays for an hour or so then goes to hunt down a sunny spot to bask and nap in. Gojira is not impressed by his stamina. Although she does take the hint and goes to find a napping spot herself.
 
Gus the Potato is already crashed in front of the screen door and dreaming of dinner or whatever it is Blond Potatoes dream of when they come back from Borkings.
 
We’ll be changing his joint supplements tonight because I don’t feel the ones he’s been getting have helped as much as the ones he used to get (and were discontinued). Still, he’s never been a run run run dog but he does get bursts of speed when he wants to. He just really would prefer to roll around in the wet grass and come home to get belly rubs. Like I said, he’s not a stupid Potato.
 
From his Auntie Jessica:
Gus is so cute in his jersey! Go Cubs! He was struggling a bit today but we still got a good walk in. I hope he gets lots of rest!
 
Best,
Jessica
 

Gojira Kitteh

BookMarkit and Paperbacks Good News!

On By Rhys FordIn Bloggy StuffLeave a comment
SUCH EXCITING NEWS!
BookMarkIt bought a huge number of Dreamspinner paperbacks, including some out of print left-over stock and are selling them on Amazon at deep discount. Don’t know how long this sale will be or if it’s geo-restricted but if you’re looking for paperbacks…
My Books are here: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=Rhys+Ford&me=A17KZ228CISAZM&ref=nb_sb_noss
All of Dreamspinner Authors can be found here: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=dreamspinner+press&me=A17KZ228CISAZM&fbclid=IwAR30PVYVu4oP4rAPIJ0sRNvJ4tPcN_VhLgEfhejEsKXKYDcea7VrpHGpTKk&ref=nb_sb_noss
If you notice the tab at the top says BookMarkIt. This is a set marketplace in Amazon so it’s rather cool for authors to have this platform. Fill out your bookshelves if there’s something you’re missing or have always wanted to get!
 

New Kitteh, Who Dis?

On By Rhys FordIn Rhys Ford5 Comments
We have a new addition to the Cabin. She comes to us as a surrender from her owners who have a new baby and they made the decision to find her a new home. She doesn’t really have a name… she was being called kitty which she doesn’t really respond to but she is now home and exploring my bedroom.
She has met the dog who spent his time in the room crashed out on his bed so she’s discovered the Potato couldn’t really care about there being another cat in the house. He’s now eating dinner which is a hell of a lot more interesting to him because he was fed later than normal.
There is a heavy gate between my room and the rest of the house and the other two cats are quietly investigating the presence of the new kitten. She’s about 7-8 months old and still a bit playful so that will be good for the Badger and she’s young enough to interest Harley who DID have a litter before she came to us.
New Kitty has allowed us to pick her up, scritched her and she’s meatloafed in my room, making squinty eyes at us. She’s been called Bob in texts because well, she didn’t have a name but that’s because of her colouring, not her personality. We’ll see what her name is over the next few days.

Thursday’s BORKING REPORT!

On By Rhys FordIn Borking Day1 Comment

Today’s BORKING REPORT!

It’s an overcast day over here in Potato Land. About 65ºF (18ºC) but it doesn’t look like it’s going to rain. I see a hint of blue skies off in the distance but it’s a grey blue so there’s still a sheen of clouds over the hills. The rain would have been nice BUT we all know how much the Potato likes to roll around in wet grass and come back stained green and with leaves stuck to him.

I’d like to NOT give him a bath today.

There’s apparently a lot of workers out today. There IS some major construction and reno being done on a lot of houses in the neighbourhood and the one thing his Auntie Jessica has been firm about is people coming up to the Potato to pet him “because he’s cute”.

BUT as we all know, when outside on a Bork, the Blond Potato is there for business. There is no stopping to talk to people. No shenanigans other than finding a wet lawn and borking at people to wear masks, stay 6 feet apart, and most of all, get off the damned roof before you kill yourself (even if you ARE a roofer). He’s also disgruntled about lawn guys with dangerous machines like chain saws and mowers. He’s quite quick to judge their safety standards like some outraged OSHA supervisor.

He came home tired and happy, having scolded the world back into order… then promptly went scuba diving into his copper bowl, shook off a waterfall of drops onto the carpet, me, and his Auntie Jessica (and a bit on Badger) then proceeded to cavort and wiggle about. Now he’s taking a bit of a rest but is contemplating eating the small amount of kibble he left behind for his breakfast. Kibble eating is a very intense stalking and must be approached thoughtful and with great reflection. One does not simply shove one’s head into the food dish. It is food, after all…and not water.

From his Auntie Jessica:
Gus did a lot of borking at all the workers out this morning! He got very tired after that walk! I hope he’s getting plenty of water and rest now.
Best, Jessica