Poignant Truths from Demetri Manabat: “I refuse to let my sons play with dolls…”

Trust me. Hold through the beginning. Hear him out.

“I refuse to let my sons play with dolls…”

@demetrimanabat

“Barbie” A poem about dolls. I hope you enjoy. Much Much Love Always & Forever Demetri #barbie #poetry #doll #spokenword #writing #writer #lasvegas

♬ what was I made for? – Instrumental – Wheeler

Well, Something is out there. Dunno if it’s the Truth.

A phone call with my mother revealed something interesting… I believe she thinks I’m an atheist.

I am not. I just don’t think organized religion is set up to do a lot beyond keeping the organization alive and profitable.

And I know there are exceptions. Small churches, temples, and such with a focus on bringing comfort and healing to their flock. Groups who seek out an understanding of the world and its people. People who are determined to stoke the good in humanity through their works and generous spirits.

I don’t deny the power of the Universe and its Creation. I just think a lot of organizations are like political parties… do anything you can to keep the machine going even though there are people within the organization who truly want to do good. They are often blocked or stymied by those who view service to humanity as “Well, we have ours and that’s all that matters.”

Do I believe that once we are done we leave this existence to go back and be cradled by the Universe? Of course I do. There’s a kind of science about that. We are energy and matter. We have a consciousness that is greater than bits of electricity going through spongy grey meat. Energy has to go somewhere. It doesn’t just cease to exist. Same with matter. All matter… water, flesh, chemicals… all of that. It doesn’t disappear. It is all absorbed back into the Universe around it and where does a consciousness go? No idea but that is a great mystery of Life and one we all should ponder on.

I believe in doing good because that’s what you do. I don’t need a Hell to make me dance like a dog in heels. That doesn’t make sense. Free will means we choose to be who we are, what we are. And to also decide the actions of those around us does not mean we act in the same manner. Even when the little voices in your head tells you to bite their faces off.

Oh, that little voice.

So yeah, here I am. Just trying to not bring shit and filth with me when I go back into the Universe.

Rainy Days and Mondays…

It is actually kind of strange to be on the verge of a new release after the last couple years… Crap. One of the things that someone struggles with following rapid succession of surgeries is how much it steals the way your brain. And since this roller coaster of the journey isn’t done yet, it’s going to be continuous fights but hopefully when I can succeed at.

It always amuses me to hear people talk about how much they enjoy writing because I don’t really enjoy it per se. It’s not like sitting down with a cup of coffee and listening to the rain. But there is a lot of satisfaction when the words fall into place at least close to what I imagine the scene is in my mind and getting the chain of events that leads to impactful scenes or even the end of the book is a kind of joy in a way.

When I write I usually start off with either a premise or a situation that comes to mind involving existing characters or the framework of a new character sort of emerges out of the goop in my brain. At the technical term by the way — goop. It always feels like sourdough bread with too much liquid in it because everything is sticky and you can’t get it off your fingers but eventually it does become something and that’s because you’ve added more substance to it. I am not a good baker. Baking is much more of a science than an art and while you can do variations with it you have to really know the limitations and how far you can push that science. Cooking is much more forgiving and in a lot of ways it is actually worse because taste is subjective.

I can say this with confidence because there is a continuous battle between The Five about arugula and whether or not it should be eaten. I happen to be a fan of arugula. Others, not so much. Keep in mind I also like canned peas and mayonnaise so we all have our culinary burdens to bear.

I am mostly hoping that Port in a Storm does well but mostly I hope that everyone who has ever brushed up against the foster care system finds it speaks to them on some level or that they see echoes of their own experiences. In a lot of ways it’s like having survived the horrors of some psychological or even physical war that no one else in the world but there are other participants who bear the same scars on their bodies and minds. In a lot of ways this is two books — on one level written for those who are Tate and Forest and on another those who are Connor. I would love for everyone to have grown up in a Morgan household but I knew from experience that is not the case. I also know it is a struggle sometimes to survive a childhood that seems impossible to live through and I wanted to write something where there is hope and depicts the family love for a child not born to its cradle.

At one point in my life I was told that nobody really wants somebody else’s child and I am going to have to agree with that because the instances are few and far between and you are trapped in the tentacles of the eldritch monster that is the foster care system or child protective services. I have long questioned the intelligence of taking children away from parents who are struggling financially and then giving those kids to people who then receive financial support to house those children. I also wonder where people who fight so hard to take away a woman’s right to choose are after an unwanted child is born and there is no food or shelter or resources to feed it and raise it into a healthy human being. I would want that for any child regardless of its situation. And if someone is able to take in the child and love it… nurture it… and create a person to contribute to life in some way then I am all for that as well.

But then again I’m pretty sure that if you read my books, you already know where I stand socially. Children in their lives should not be a political piece on some gameboard but often times they are because they have no rights and many don’t make it to adulthood intact.

Writing Port in a Storm was both cathartic and a sticky mess. So I guess the best thing that we all can do is to speak kindly to yourself and be gentle with the wounds that you carry. Some days won’t be easy — I know that. Trust me. There are a lot of days when I’m like what the fuck is going on and why am I here?

On those days is when you need that cup of coffee or tea and if it isn’t raining where you are then maybe find some rain sounds to listen to and give yourself a few moments. You deserve that. I promise, you deserve that.

New October LGBQ+ Event: Northern Rainbow Romance Retreat in Toronto, Canada

This unique event will bring together published authors and PAs in the queer romance genre for a two day retreat, with the opportunity to write, collaborate, and learn from each other together and separately. VIP readers will then join for a personal weekend experience with their favourite authors. The retreat will also include a fabulous public signing event featuring all participating authors, with dedicated time for VIP readers.

Dates: October 2-6, 2024
Location: Toronto, Canada (near an international airport)

Retreat Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/870322401223965

All events will take place within the same facility. We will have a group rate for hotel rooms, discounted parking, and airport shuttles.

Register for the event here:
https://northernromanceretreat.ticketspice.com/northern-romance-retreat

Guilty Pleasures and Food Videos… Sorta

I absolutely love watching a food channel that features small diners and food shops in Japan. I have no idea why but there is something very comforting about visiting these places through video and watching them cook. Often times they are dishes that I have seen countless times before and have even made myself but still… I will watch an old grandma beat a pork cutlet to death to make tonkatsu.

Some of them are very long and I actually watch them in small chunks because I think two hours or even three hours is a bit much. I really prefer the ones that are under an hour or even under half an hour. But I thought I would share with you an episode of a Chinese food shop located in Kyoto.

One thing I really enjoy about these is sometimes I learn how to make a dish a different way than how I make it so it adds to my culinary awareness. Of course, usually I also marvel at some people’s knife skills. Especially anyone who can make daikon ribbons.

Interesting. Fascinated by the spectrum of fabric when combined with a hard medium.

@metmuseum

What do you do when one of the most famous tutus in the world needs a glow up? Just ask The Met’s Glenn Petersen, Conservator at The Costume Institute who worked to update the real cloth tutu on Degas’ beloved sculpture “The Little Fourteen-Year-Old Dancer.” Fun Fact: Degas’s original sculpture was made of many unorthodox materials, including tinted beeswax, a human-hair wig, a cotton bodice, linen ballet slippers, and tarlatan tutu. Curators at The Met have replaced the fabric skirt at least three times in the past to tackle deterioration or just plain dissatisfaction with its appearance.   See the sculpture on view at The Met in gallery 815. #Conservation #BalletTok  #LearnOnTikTok

♬ original sound – The Met

Got Ramen?

A long time ago — or at least a decade ago — a very good friend of mine asked me to show her how to make ramen. Not the kind that you do on the stovetop with a seasoning packet but rather a ramen that was more in line with what you get in a restaurant. I told her, much like fried rice, ramen can contain anything. Whatever you have in the refrigerator is okay.

Now I get what she was asking because ramen can be very involved and time-consuming if you want something that is in three minutes on the stove with flavoring packet. But there are lots of layers of elevation between a cup of noodles you pour water into and something you get at a high-end ramen restaurant.

Food is a funny thing because if you grow up with something that is considered a street food or something you get at home, it’s perplexing that people will pay way too much money for way so little. You are definitely paying for ingredients and culinary skill at a good restaurant but that isn’t to say you can’t give yourself a better bowl of ramen at home for less than five bucks.

You can purchase better ramen noodles than a $.25 packet but honestly, it’s okay to use those noodles. Ramen is a comfort meal. A street food much like sushi. What you have on hand is good enough and let’s face it, isn’t going to cost you $20. I mean it could if you wanted to but how about just something for dinner?

Instant miso packets and a broth made with Better Than Bouillon can give you a very hearty base. This is to replace the seasoning packet that comes with the instant noodles but you could also hold onto that packet and use it to season chicken or pork later on. Or you can just use broth.

But what to put on top of the ramen? Pretty much anything you have in the fridge or freezer. Minced green onions are good. So are frozen peas and carrots that you run under hot water. You can add a hard-boiled egg cut in half or you can lightly beaten egg and fry it then chop it up into strips. Some people use corn. Some people toss in the leftover meat that they had the night before after they slice it up. Or even squares of tofu if you have that. The key is to make sure that they are small enough that you can pick it up with chopsticks and put it in your mouth as one bite.

Bean sprouts. Strips of seaweed. Hell, even fish sticks. Ground up Vienna sausage or hot dog sliced diagonally or even Spam. So long as whatever you’re adding is good for you.

Boil the noodles. Make your broth. Put the hot noodles in a bowl then pour your broth over the noodles. Garnish with whatever you pulled it together and then go have dinner. A bunch of little things goes a long way in making ramen. If you have wontons or any type of dumplings, cook those and toss them in. Add shoyu (soy sauce) to taste and if you have it, drizzle a little sesame seed oil on top or even chili crisps.

It doesn’t need to be elaborate if you don’t want it to be. It just has to warm your belly and give you a sense of home.

And yes, sometimes the best ramen can be found in the sketchiest places.