And I’m reclaiming my brain and routine, it’s kind of been an odd long haul where I think; Oh, I’ve got some things brewing up and I can start writing. And then a few hours later, the shutdown begins again and I’m pushed back a few steps.

Some of it is physical. My body has some really shitty days and some not so bad. What I have found has been helpful is music. For too long in this stupid internal crap journey, I’ve lost the need to have music going… to read… to even cook things I enjoy cooking. So that’s been the paths I’ve recently begun clearing the weeds from.

There’s a fuckton of debris. And I can’t say that these paths will lead me back to where I was and that’s probably okay. But the comfort and familiarity of the words, the sound, and even the disengagement I get when chopping a bunch of things and shoving food into people is returning.

And God, it’s like breathing during a crisp, cold day.

So, I’m sharing one of my favourite Metallia songs and it’s so great to get that kick in my soul at listening to it.