Authoring Et Al and Nonsense.

https://i2.wp.com/25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_md1kub0bzw1rh6vpho1_500.gif?resize=300%2C170Why blog?

Okay, there’s a lot of dos and don’ts about being an author. Most of them come off like advice from used cars salesmen. You hear shit like maximize exposure, cross-promotional streaming and all sorts of buzzwords that pretty much boil down to getting into people’s faces and piss them off. Because they’re SICK of seeing you.

Is there a fine balance between getting word out that you’re an author and moving up into someone’s asshole so every time they fart, you’ve attached a balloon to the gas with streamers shouting your name? Yes. There certainly is.

I just haven’t found it yet.

To be honest, I’m a pretty crass person. Or so I think. I look at people who can pull themselves together on a daily basis and wonder how the hell do they do that? I was a grubby little child and I feel like I’m a grubby round adult. I bathe. Every day. *grins* But you know, there’s a certain amount of emotional grub that just doesn’t seem to wash off. And getting up into someone’s face feels like I’m just smearing it around someone else.

So promotions? Yeah, I have to do them if I want people to read what I write. I have to twitter and blog. Because part of being a writer is being an author… and that’s where the writing stops and the hawking begins.

Now if you’ve ever been to a big mall, you’ve seen the phone kiosks where a bunch of douche-bag sales people who aren’t old enough to cut their own toenails try to sell you a phone service. There was a time when these ill-mannered asshats would call out to people as they walked by… like people were chattel to be herded in. They were taught that they needed to get the passer-bys’ attention no matter what. It’s like listening to a cesspool of bullies trying to chum the waters with blood they scraped off the lunchroom lady.

That’s what promoting my books feels like to me.

It could be a cultural thing. We’re taught not to shout out our accomplishments. Trust me, it’s ingrained at an early age. It feels WRONG to scream LOOK AT ME! Sure, the ego strokes are nice but oh, it’s a dangerous thing to fall into. Massive egos and bitterness are fed from compliments. Promoting a book feels like that. It does.

So how to balance out what I feel about promotions with what I should be doing as an author. Let’s face it, if no one knows that I have stuff out there, no one will read it. And if no one reads my stuff, the future stuff doesn’t get bought. But let’s face it, how many times have you been on Twitter, Facebook or Goodreads and said “God, I wish this author’s fingers were broken so I don’t see them “chat me up” any more?

I’ve made a deal with myself. I’ll do promos but I’ll try to do them my way. I’ll retweet reviews, which is kind of silly now that I think about it because people who are following me ALREADY read my books but hey, let’s go with that for right now. I’ll blog a bit about writing but let’s face it. It’s pretty fricking boring to listen to me talk about my writing process. If you all have any questions about anything, I figure you’d ask me. I probably will answer anything you ask me. Honestly. Openly. Unless you ask me why Ben shot Cole and Rick. Out of luck there.

I’ll post excerpts. And I’ll probably post swearing comments about how a fucking book isn’t going anywhere because damn it my brain isn’t working. This happens more than I care for but it’s a part of writing.

There will be posts about music, food and other sundry items in my life because hey, I find odd things interesting and I’ll share them in case you need something to gloss over while you drink your morning coffee.

So I’ll say here, if ever I start tipping over to the carnival sideshow hawking, kick me. Deal? ‘Cause dudes, I know better.

Okay, back to Whiskey and Wry. I finally found the beginning point of the story. But oh, that’s another blog. About writing shit. Process, yeah whatever.*grins*

13 thoughts on “Authoring Et Al and Nonsense.

      1. Denni

        True that *sigh* b/c I somehow managed to get out of town once with less than half of what I needed. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to find women’s underwear (much less suitable panties) in Ketchikan, Alaska? Where (what passes for) the local mall doesn’t include a women’s clothing store?

        Panties aside (is that really what I wanted to say?) I love your website, promote yourself as you think best.

      2. Mail order underwear! No honestly, sites have the best deals. Local malls sometimes only carry the plebian 😀

        Heh and thank you! I’m glad you like the site!

  1. Treasure

    It seems like the old days of publishers sending author’s out on book tours and signings are over with. Or maybe only happens with the big 6. I think as an author in this genre working with a small press you have to do a fair amount of self promotion. On the other hand, while I will probably never make it to Chicago to see a Susan Elizabeth Phillips reading and signing, I can and do follow my favorite authors around the world through the blog stops and interviews and their own websites. And yanno it does work. Through your website I found Lou Sylvre and Sonny and Luki.

    1. Excellent! I’m glad you found Lou. She’s sweet and brilliant.

      Internet DOES make things so much easier. ‘Cause I can find new authors I adore all the time. And authors going on out book tours are SO expensive. Really, blogging. Much cheaper *grins*

      What I DO want to avoid are the tweet info-storms some authors do… things that say Oh your Kindle/Nook/iPad is lonely! BUY MY BOOK! Seeing that 500 times a day gets annoying 😀 There definitely is a good balance. Like bacon.

      Okay, there’s no such thing as too much bacon. Forget I said that.

  2. Patricia Grayson

    I don’t have to ask why Ben shot Cole and Rick. Has any one of your readers asked you that? I like the way you handle that episode in Cole’s history.

    1. I purposely didn’t answer that in the first book. To be honest, I’ll probably answer it at the end of the series. Or at least if the series shifts and Cole needs that closure. I can’t see the series lasting 13 books. There’s only so many times Cole can be shot. *grins* And thank you.

  3. Sadonna

    I think you are balancing all of this quite well. I think also as women “of a certain age” – at least I count myself in that category – we have been socialized to not take credit for accomplishments and not call attention to ourselves. I would have a TERRIBLE time trying to promote anything. I always said if I had to be in sales I would starve because I’m just no good at that. I would like to just do my job and nobody even needs to know my name 😉

    I find your blog refreshing and entertaining and informative. And while I have NO aspirations to write anything beyond hopefully a FEW Christmas cards this year it’s interesting to hear about your writing process. 😀 And you know – when we might be getting more yummy books 😉

    1. I’d suck at sales. And I come from a family of liars! They can sell ice to Eskimos but see it makes me feel like abuse. Do you really need that jacket? I mean where are you going to wear a parka in Jamaica? Here, try this t-shirt. And it’s on clearance! I’d starve.

      Mostly my writing process involves a lot of coffee, music and swearing. *grins*

      1. Sadonna

        Ha! Sounds a lot like my work process. Although my current client is pretty straight-laced which has really cut into the swearing!

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